Jokes Duniya

Hello everybody,

I was wondering what will happen to Santa Singh if he gets married? Will he say to his friends “Love is one long sweet dream, and marriage is the alarm clock.” after he gets married. No maybe Santa Singh isn’t as smart as that.

And after marriage. What will happen to the couple? Will they be as happy as they were before?

Here is a joke for women to enjoy:

A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his wife stayed home.He wanted her to see what he went through so he prays:

Dear Lord, I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through, so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day.
Amen.

God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man’s wish.

Read on more here to see what happens to the man.

BTW this joke was also voted for the Women’s Favorite E-mail of the Year! .

But wait a minute what about the men? Dont worry. There are jokes about women for men too:

A store that sells husbands has just opened where a woman may go to choose a husband from among many men.

The store is composed of 6 floors, and the men increase in positive attributes as the shopper ascends the flights.

There is, however, a catch. As you open the door to any floor you may choose a man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.

So a woman goes to the shopping center to find a husband.

Read on more here to see what happens to the women.

And here are some really funny one liners about marriage:

• A man received a letter from some kidnappers. The letter said, “If you don’t promise to send us 100,000,000 we promise you we will kidnap your wife.” The poor man wrote back, ” I am afraid I can’t keep my promise but I hope you will keep yours.”




• When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: either the car is new or the wife.




• I wrote your name on sand it got washed.
  I wrote your name in air, it was blown away.
  Then I wrote your name on my heart & I got Heart Attack

For more marriage jokes.Click here to laugh.

A friend of mine had a bike accident last week. It wasn’t a major injury but the fractured arm had to be plastered. I went to visit her. She wanted me to write something on her plastered arm.

What I wrote on her arm was a joke about Tarzan, after that she couldn’t help but laugh wildly. The joke became something like an instant pain reliever. Now everytime she’d get bored, resting in her bed with a fractured arm, she can read that joke and laugh her heart out.

Do you want to know what that Tarzan joke was?
“What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah?
==> Wow, a new Underwear for me!”

I guess that’s the fun of short and sweet jokes, they’re short but everytime you remember them you start laughing.

Actually the fun in cracking short jokes at parties or get togethers is something special because that makes people remember you. I remember an uncle who shared a joke about a sardarji and his scooter and everytime the children see him, they start calling him out- “There goes the ’scooter uncle’….” . What I mean is that some jokes make you really remarkable because people tend to remember you by that very joke! Add some zing to your own get togethers too. See this one:

I guess my injured friend’s little cousins are not going to remember me as the “Tarzan auntie”!Just kidding, they have other strong reasons to remember me.

Anyways, I enjoy short jokes a lot because I tend to remember them more than longer ones. How about you?

Do you also enjoy cracking jokes at gatherings? So how about standing out in the crowd by cracking some funny short jokes?
May be like this one: or if you see someone drunken then may be this one:

What I say is, you always get what you give and you always get nice smiles when you share nice jokes.
Click here:

There’ s a child in all of us. Every once in a while that child just comes out in a form of innocence or in a form of childish humour.

Do you know what Pappu would say if asked, “What do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?”

The answer that Papppu would give is sweet, and true if you’ve been a backbencher in your class- “Teacher”, of course!!

Whenever I think of my own schooldays, all those golden flashbacks of yesteryears come to me in a real slow motion. I know it sounds real filmy but I bet you guys have your own sweet memories of your school and college days too.

Homeworks are always boring, you don’t agree? Take a look here:



The sun shines bright in a classroom when the Math teacher falls sick and a class is off! How about wishing him well?

Think of those unwelcomed examinations and then your weak preparations. Remember how you wanted to get rid of those exam fevers?

Here’s a good joke for it:
A good friend is one who tells you to study well, but a best friend is one who stands outside the examination room and shouts
“Abbe kuch aa raha hai ya aur cheat fekuuuu”

A little touch of humour mixed with little masti and fun of school and college days can really really turn you ON. That’s the beauty of laughter and jokes. And on top of all that, school and college jokes are something that we all can relate to.

Well, do you want to know what happened to a college student who needed to give a wildlife Zoology test?

What happened when the zoology professor passed out a sheet of paper divided into four squares- in each square was a carefully drawn picture of a bird’s legs?? No bodies,no feet, just legs. How did the student recognize the birds??

Get the answer here:

Ever wondered what microsoft would look like if it built a car ?
Hm..
It will of course have windows. A lot of high tech windows.And here are 2 things that I am pretty sure that microsoft will implement.

• The airbag system would say, “Are you sure?” before going off.
• To turn of the engine the driver would have to first press the start button !

 
Ah, that was funny. But we all know that technology and computers have grown to such an extent that it has almost overpowered human beings. I am not implying that it is a bad thing. But at least we can have laugh about how we are changin each day.

Take a look at these pictures to see how much daily lives have been changed:

This week we will be posting a lot more jokes like these about computers, computer companies, and other technology related stuffs.

You can get them right now here.

Okay now what if restaurants functioned like Microsoft.
Here is a possible scenario.

Guest : Waiter!

Waiter ( arrives) :

Hi, my name is Bill and I’ll be your Support. May I have your telephone number, area code first before you say anything else? Your visit may be monitored for purposes of quality control. Now, what seems to be the problem?

Guest : There’s a fly in my soup!

Waiter: Exit the restaurant and re-enter, maybe the fly won’t be there this time.

Guest: No, it’s still there.

Waiter: Maybe it’s the way you’re using the soup; try eating it with a fork instead.

Guest: Even when I use the fork, the fly is still there.

Waiter: Maybe the soup is incompatible with the bowl; what kind of bowl are you using?

Guest: A SOUP bowl!

Waiter: Hmmm, that should work. Maybe it’s a configuration problem; how was the bowl set up?

Guest: You brought it to me on a saucer; what has that to do with the fly in my soup?

Waiter: Can you remember everything you did before you noticed the fly in your soup?

Guest: I sat down and ordered the Soup of the Day!

Waiter: Have you considered upgrading to the latest Soup of the Day?

Guest: You have more than one Soup of the Day each day?

Waiter: Yes, the Soup of the Day is changed every hour.

Guest: Well, what is the Soup of the Day now?

Waiter: The current Soup of the Day is tomato.

Guest: Fine. Bring me the tomato soup and the check. I’m running late now.

[Waiter leaves and returns with another bowl of soup and the check.]

Waiter: Here you are, Sir. The soup and your check.

Guest: This is potato soup.

Waiter: Yes, the tomato soup wasn’t ready yet.

Guest: Well, I’m so hungry now, I’ll eat anything.

[Waiter leaves.]

Guest: Waiter! There’s a cockroach in my soup!

The check:

Soup of the Day . . . . . . . . . . . $ 5.00

Upgrade to newer Soup of the Day. . . $ 2.50

Access to support . . . . . . . . . . $10.00

Note: Bug in the soup included at no extra charge

(will be fixed with Tomorrow’s soup of the day)

Click here for more funny computer stuffs like these.