Nasty and Rude Jokes




Aisa chaukidaar chahiye jo…



Officer: Dekho, humme aisa chaukidaar chahiye jo sehatmand ho, chust, chalak aur chaukanna ho, jarurat parne par jisse hum daat bhi saake

guard

Yadi tumhare andar yeh saare guun shamil hai to tumhe yeh naukri mil sakti hai.

Umeedwaar : Saheb yeh saare gun meri biwi mein hai, usse bulau?

Comments(7)| |

New doctor



Nayi(new) doctor ne apni life ka pehla operation kiya! Operation ki thodi der baad hi marij mar gaya!

praying.jpg

Marij ke marne ke baad doctor ne diwar par tangi bhagwan ki taswir ki ore haath jodkar sir jhukate hue puri shradha ke saath kaha: Hey prabhu meri ore se yeh pehli bhet swikar kijiye!

Comments(26)| |

Husband’s poem on saali



**WARNING**
THIS IS NOT TRUE IN CASE OF EVERY SAALI. AND DO NOT TAKE THIS PERSONALLY!!

Saali is Beauty, Wife is Duty

Saali is Pension, Wife is Tension

Saali is Yummy, Wife is Vehmi

bored-husband.jpg

Saali is Pataka, Wife is BATAKA

Saali is Cool, Wife is Fool

Saali is Tooti – Fruity, Wife is Kismat Futi

Saali is Fresh cake , Wife is earth QUAKE

*Ek Dukhi Paati.*

Comments(49)| |

Nutrition



Ek 10 saal ka bachha bahot dhyan se ek book pad raha tha, jiska title tha: “Kids ka paalan poshan kaise kare”.

nutirtion.jpg

Mother: Tum yeh book kyon pad rahe ho.

Kid: Main yeh dekhna chahta hoon ke mera paalan poshan theek tara se ho raha hai ya nahi.

Comments(19)| |

Hai koi jawaab???



A man and his wife were seeking a divorce at a local court. But the custody of their child posed a problem.

The mother jumped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she had brought the child into this world, she should retain custody.

court

The man also wanted custody of his child. The judge asked for his side of the story too.

After a long moment of silence, the man rose from his chair and argued, “Your Honour, when I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Pepsi comes out, does the Pepsi belong to me or to the machine?”

Hai koi jawaab???

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