Best Business and Office Jokes




IT husband



Starting the day with a conversation between a wife and a husband who happens to be a software engineer.

Husband: (Returning late from work) “Good Evening Dear, I’m now logged in.”

Wife: Have you brought the grocery?

Husband: Bad command or file name.

Wife: But I told you in the morning

Husband: Erroneous syntax. Abort?

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Wife: What about my new TV?

Husband: Variable not found…

Wife: At least, give me your Credit Card, I want to do some shopping.

Husband: Sharing Violation. Access denied…

Wife: Do you love me or do you only love computers or are you just being funny?

Husband: Too many parameters…

Wife: It was a great mistake that I married an idiot like you.

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Husband: Data type mismatch.

Wife: You are useless.

Husband:
It’s by Default.

Wife: What about your Salary?

Husband: File in use… Try after some time.

Wife: What is my value in the family.

Husband: Unknown Virus.

Comments(8)| |

I am the boss



A boss was complaining in a staff meeting the other day that he wasn’t getting any respect.

Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small sign that read, “I’m the Boss”.

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He then taped it to his office door.

Later that day when he returned from lunch, he found that someone had taped a note to the sign that said. “Your wife called, She wants her sign back!”

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Difference between work and prison



IN PRISON
You spend the majority of
your time in an 8′X10′ cell.
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AT WORK

You spend most of your
time in a 6′X8′ cubic..
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Comments(13)| |

Smart dogs



Four men were bragging about how smart their dogs were.

One man was an engineer, the second man was an accountant, the third man was a chemist, and the fourth was a government worker.

To show off, the engineer called to his dog. “T-square, do your stuff.” T-square trotted over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen, and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.

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Everyone agreed that that that was pretty smart.
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Comments(14)| |

Hot shot



A young businessman had just started his own firm. He rented a beautiful office and had it furnished with antiques.

Sitting there, he saw a man come into the outer office. Wishing to appear the hot shot, the businessman picked up the phone and started to pretend he had a big deal working.

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He threw huge figures around and made giant commitments. Finally he hung up and asked the visitor, “Can I help you?”

The man said, “Yeah, I’ve come to activate your phone lines.”

Comments(0)| |

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