(15 votes, average: 4.4 out of 5)
Loading ...One employee told his boss, “Sir, Increase my salary, I got married recently.”
The boss replied, “The Company cannot compensate for the accidents happened outside of the company.”
(9 votes, average: 4 out of 5) Loading ...A man went to face an interviewer. Board of Directors asked him, “Tell the difference between “COMPLETE” and “FINISH”.
The man replied, I am clarifying with the example, “When u marry a right person you are “Complete” and when you marry the wrong one you are “Finish”.
(8 votes, average: 4 out of 5) Loading ...This is an actual job application a 17 year old boy submitted at a Mcdonald’s fast-food establishment in Florida… And they hired him because he was so honest and funny!
Name: John Flower
Sex: Not yet. Still waiting for the right person.
Desired position: Company’s president or vice president. But seriously, whatever available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn’t be applying here in the first place.
Desired salary: $185,000 a year plus stock options and a michael ovitz style severance package. If that’s not possible, make an offer and we can haggle.
Education: yes.
Last position held: Target for middle management hostility.
Salary: Less than I’m worth.
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(7 votes, average: 2.71 out of 5) Loading ...A very successful partner in a big firm had a peculiar habit. He would go to his desk everyday, open a locked drawer, look inside, lock the drawer again, and start his work. This continued for many days.
His subordinates knew that he hid the secret of his success in the drawer, they waited for the opportunity.
Then, one day when the partner had gone out of the city, the juniors decided to make a break.
They broke into the drawer, breathlessly, and looked inside. There was one small piece of paper inside - it said - “Left is debit and right is credit.”
(8 votes, average: 4.25 out of 5) Loading ...In light of all the recent news surrounding airline bankruptcies and mergers, you might want to heed these warning signs…
10. They hedged their fuel by buying $500 in Sam’s Club Fuel Cards.
9. The new sign in the terminal reads “BYOB” Bring Your Own Blankets.
8. The Flight Attendant asks if she can borrow your iPod touch to plug in to the video unit so they can have an in flight movie.
7. You look into the cockpit and noticed that the pilots are those blow up dummies from the movie “Airplane”.
6. There are Google Ads running on the back of all the seats.
5. Last 5 People Off the Plane Have to Clean Up.
4. In order to pay for extra fuel the dreaded “$1 for every pound you’re over 200 pounds” tax has been added to all tickets
3. All flights now will offer in air casinos.
2. The stock’s price on the screen says “Close to Zero”.
1. Good News…free drinks. Bad News……$5 for toilets!
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