Funny and Hilarious Jokes

Shocking Telegrams

A man from Agra went to Ajmer. His wife was in her parent’s house in Delhi.

When the man went to Ajmer, he asked his servant to send a telegram to his wife indicating about his trip to Ajmer.


He sent a telegram. When the wife received the telegram, she fainted.
It was written:
Sethji aaj mar! Gaye! (Sethji Ajmer gaye )

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Jack fruit

Three friends were traveling and went to a desert and were not getting any food. After a long search they got one Jack fruit and some bananas. They ate bananas at night and put the Jack fruit for morning breakfast.

Next morning when they woke up and described what they dreamt at night. One is telling I went to 7th layer of the sky and saw nice young fairies were dancing besides me.


Another one is telling that I went bottom of the Atlantic Ocean. One beautiful girl came and kissed me and told me that she is the Queen of the Sea. She touches my hands and whole night we ate, drank and made merry. Really fantastic.

3rd one is now describing what he dreamt and he said, “I saw one Black tall ghost, who came to me and chased me and ordered me to eat the Jack fruit. But I told him I have got two friends, without them I will not eat the Jack fruit.


But the Ghost made me eat the Jack fruit and I ate it all. I tried to call you two, but one of you were in Mid sky and another was under the sea and having fun, so I could do save it for u!

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Bad conductor

A man is working on the buses in the US collecting tickets.

He rings the bell for the driver to set off when there’s a woman half getting on the bus. The driver sets off, the woman falls from the bus and is killed. At the trial the man is sent down for murder and seeing as it’s Texas he’s sent to the electric chair.

On the day of his execution he’s sat in the chair and the executioner grants him a final wish.


“Well” says the man, “Is that your packed lunch over there?” “Yes” answers the executioner. “Can I have that green banana?”
Continue Reading »

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Marriage advice

One friend asked to another friend, “What will you advise your children about marriage?”


Another friend replied, “I will never marry in my life and I will give same advice to my children also.”

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Finger Print

Police Inspector : Have you caught the thief?
Hawaldar : No, but I found some trace of him.


Police Inspector : What?
Hawaldar : Finger prints.

Police Inspector : Where?
Hawaldar : On my cheeks.

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