Funny and Hilarious Jokes





Saving a president



One day Bush was out jogging and accidentally fell from a bridge into a very cold river.
Three boys, playing along the river, saw the accident. Without a second thought, they jumped in the water and dragged the wet president out of the river.

After cleaning up he said, “Boys, you saved the President of the United States today. You deserve a reward. You name it, I’ll give it to you.”

drown.jpg

The first boy said, “Please, I’d like a ticket to Disneyland!”

“I’ll personally hand it to you,” said Bush. “I’d like a pair of Nike Air Turbos,” the second boy said.
“I’ll buy them myself and give them to you,” said Bush. “And I’d like a wheelchair with a stereo in it,” said the third boy.

wheelchair.jpg

“I’ll personally … wait a second, son, you’re not handicapped!”

“No, but I will be when my father finds out whom I saved from drowning.”

Comments(1)| |

Where is pa



A farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn.

The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise and yelled over to the boy, “Hey Willis, forget your troubles. Come in and visit with us. I’ll help you get the wagon up later.”

“That’s mighty nice of you,” Willis answered, “but I don’t think Pa would like me to.”

“Aw come on boy,” the farmer insisted.

wagon.jpg

“Well okay,” the boy finally agreed, and added, “but Pa won’t like it.”

After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. “I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset.”

“Don’t be foolish!” the neighbor said with a smile. “By the way, where is he?”

“Under the wagon.”
the boy replied!

Comments(1)| |

Family Problem



Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar
drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man
said to the American, “You know my parents are
forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven’t even met once.” We call this arranged marriage.

bar

I don’t want to marry a woman whom I don’t love… I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems.

The American said, Talking about love marriages… I’ll tell you my story.

Continue Reading »

Comments(10)| |

It’s time to go to school!



Early one morning, a mother Sardarni went in to wake up her Sardar son.

“Wake up, son. “

“But why, Mom? I don’t want to go.”

Principal

“Give me two reasons why you don’t want to go.”

“Well, the kids hate me for one, and the teachers hate me also!”

“Oh, that’s no reason not to go to school. Come on now and get ready.”

“Give me two reasons why I should go to school.”

“Well, for one, you’re 52 years old. And for another, you’re the PRINCIPAL!”

Comments(3)| |

The Human Race…



A little girl asked her mother, “How did the human race come about?”

The Mother answered, “God made Adam and Eve; they had children and, so all mankind was made.”

A few days later, the little girl asked her father the same question. The father answered, “Many years ago there were monkeys, and we developed from them.”

motherchat.jpg

The confused girl returns to her mother and says, “Mom, how is it possible that you told me that the human race was created by God , and Papa says we developed from monkeys?”

The Mother answers,
“Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about the origin of my side of the family, and your father told you about his side.”

Comments(1)| |

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