Jokes Duniya

Two men, one American and an Indian were sitting in a bar
drinking shot after shot.

The Indian man said to the American, “You know my parents are
forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven’t even met once.” We call this arranged marriage.

I don’t want to marry a woman whom I don’t love… I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems.

The American said, Talking about love marriages… I’ll tell you my story.

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Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company’s Christmas Party. He didn’t even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

Jack had to force himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror.

Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in Lipstick:

“Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian”

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper.

His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, “Son… What happened last night?”

“Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.

Confused, he asked his son, “So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??”

His son replies, “Oh THAT! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, “Leave me alone, I’m married!!”

Broken Coffee Table $239.99 Hot Breakfast $4.20 Two Aspirins $.38 Saying the right thing, at the right time. . . PRICELESS!!

Two priests were riding very fast on a motorcycle. They were promptly stopped by a policeman who said, “What do you think you are doing?“

“What if you have an accident?”

The priests say, “Don’t worry, my son. God is with us.”

The policeman says, “In that case, I have to book you. Three people are not allowed to ride on a motorcycle.”

Ek din adaalat mein judge ne ek mujrim ko sajaa sunaate huye kaha, “Iske dono kaan kaat liye jaye.”

Mujrim ne bahoot bhaye ke saath kaha, “Rahem karo my baap, kaan kaat lenge toh main andha ho jaonga.”

Judge ne ascharya se poocha kaan kaatne se andhe kaise hoge, mujrim ne kaha “My baap kaan kaat lenge toh main chashma kahan lagaunga.”

A girl came back home from the school and asked her grandmother, “Granny, what is a lover ?”

“A lover!!” the grandmother said. “Let me think. Lov… Lover…. Oh, my God!”

She rushed to the wall, pulled aside the hanging rug, revealing a hidden closet door.

She unlocked the door, and a skeleton of a young man fell out from the closet.