Old Age and Retirement Jokes



Plastic Surgeon makes lot Differences

(3 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
 Loading ...

A 60 year old woman was walking along when she heard a voice from above “You will live to be 100.”

She looked around and didn t see anyone. Again she heard, “You will live to be 100.”

Oh! she thought to herself, that was the voice of God. I’ve got 40 more years to live! So off she went to the plastic surgeon.

Surgery

She got everything fixed from head to toe. When she left the plastic surgeon’s office, she got hit by a bus,died, and went up to heaven.

She said to God, “You told me I would live to be 100. I was supposed to have had 40 more years. So how come you let the bus kill me?”.

God said, “I didn’t recognize you”.


The teeth…

(14 votes, average: 3.79 out of 5)
 Loading ...

The old man ordered one hamburger,one order of French fries and one drink and the old man unwrapped the plain hamburger and carefully cut it in half.

burger

He placed one half in front of his wife. He then carefully counted out the French fries, dividing them into two piles and neatly placed one pile in front of his wife.

Continue Reading »


Pages (3): « 1 2 [3]

Receive the best jokes...

Tired of all those crappy, "not so funny" old jokes?

We have gone through thousands of jokes and selected only the funniest ones which will definitely make you laugh your ass off.

Simply fill and submit the form below and receive the hilarious jokes every week in your email:

Name:
Email: