One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.
The truck’s driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.
He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.
Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.
The blonde started laughing.
Why does a blonde keep empty beer bottles in her fridge?
They are for those who don’t drink!
How do you keep a blonde busy?
You give her a bottle of shampoo that says: “Lather, rinse, and repeat.”
How do you confuse a blonde?
You don’t. They’re born that way.
Why did the blonde tip toe past the medicine cabinet?
So she wouldn’t wake up the Sleeping Pills.
Two blondes had driven across the country to see Disney World in Florida.
As they approached it and got onto the final stretch of highway, they saw a sign saying
“Disney World Left!”
After thinking for a minute, the driver blonde said “Oh well!” and started driving back home.
A blonde is on a small two seater plane when suddenly the pilot dies. Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabs the radio.
“Mayday, mayday! My pilot just died!”
Ground control receive her call for help and answers back:
“Don’t worry, madam. I’ll talk you down, just do as I say. First I need you to give me your height and position”
“I’m 5″2′ and sitting in the front”
Three women are about to be executed. One’s a brunette, one’s a redhead and one’s a blonde.
The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, ”Ready! Aim!” Suddenly the brunette yells, ”EARTHQUAKE!!!” Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.
The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, ”Ready! Aim!” Suddenly the redhead yells, ‘‘TORNADO!” Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.
By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, Ready! Aim!” and the blonde yells, ”FIRE!!!”
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