Dumb Blonde Jokes



High Flying

(6 votes, average: 4.33 out of 5)
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A blonde is on a small two seater plane when suddenly the pilot dies. Not knowing how to fly a plane she grabs the radio.

“Mayday, mayday! My pilot just died!

Aeroplane

Ground control receive her call for help and answers back:

Don’t worry, madam. I’ll talk you down, just do as I say. First I need you to give me your height and position”

“I’m 5″2′ and sitting in the front”.


Shortage of Parachutes

(8 votes, average: 3.88 out of 5)
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A blonde, a brunette, a movie star, the pope, and a pilot were on a plane. The plane was going down fast and there were only four parachutes for all five of them.

Parachute

The pilot took one and jumped then the movie star took one and jumped and then the blonde took one and jumped.

The pope told the brunette to take the last one. The brunette said, “There are still 2 parachutes left! The blonde took my bag!”


Catch Again

(5 votes, average: 5 out of 5)
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After a long night, the blonde asks her friend: “Say, do you have AIDS?”.

blonde

“NO!”, the guy answers firmly, “Of course not!”

“Oh, that’s good”, replies the blonde, “I don’t wanna catch it again”.


Alligator wearing shoes?

(12 votes, average: 3.83 out of 5)
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A blonde walks into a shoe shop in Florida and asks the assistant:

“Have you got any alligator shoes for sale?”.

“Yes!” He replied, “They are $2,500?

“I’m not paying that!” the shocked blonde exclaimed.

“I will go into the Everglades, catch an Alligator and get my own”

Alligator

“Good luck!” said the amused assistant.

So the blonde walked out of the shop.

At 6 o’clock the assistant had finished work and was on his way home when he saw the blonde waist deep in water, holding a baseball bat.

He shouts over to the blonde; “How are you doing?”.

The blonde points over to a pile of dead alligators layed on the bank.

“I’ve killed 6 alligators and not one of them is wearing shoes!”


I’m not giving up

(6 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5)
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A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store.

After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine. She set it on the ground, puts sixty more cents into the machine and pushes another button suddenly, a coke comes out the machine!

Slot machine

She continued to do this until a man waiting to use the machine became impatient.

“Excuse me, can I get my soda and then you can go back to whatever stupid thing you are doing?”

The blonde turns around and says, “Yeah right! I’m not giving up this machine while I’m still winning!.”

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